I’m doing my weekly weigh-in a day early because tomorrow I’m leaving on vacation (!) and won’t be able to write for a few days. So I’ll get right to it – this week I lost 1.4 pounds. And this week was hard. I thought after a much easier second week it would only get better. I was definitely wrong.
I’m not sure what the difference was, but this week I was so much hungrier and had a lot less motivation to stick within my point range. I gave in and ate a lot more junk food, using up my points for the day much more quickly than if I stuck with healthy foods. I went over my daily target almost every single day. Granted, I still have plenty of “extra” points left over, but I’m trying really hard not to use those unless it’s a really special occasion. I don’t like using a handful of them every single day just because I’d rather eat chips than carrots.
I am happy that I lost over a pound because I really wasn’t expecting it. Like last week it feels pretty insignificant, but in three weeks I’ve lost 6.6 pounds which is a lot better than I could do on my own. It also makes me feel better to know I can give in every once in awhile and it won’t make that big of a difference. I just wish I didn’t have to think about it so much. It still feels like a big struggle. I’m thinking about food all the time and I’m really sick of it.
One of my biggest struggles this week has been thinking about baking – and how I just can’t trust myself to make anything because I’ll eat way too much of whatever I make. I truly have a passion for baking and in the past year I’ve started to feel like since it’s the only thing I’m really good at, I should start focusing on it as a potential career path. And now I feel like that dream has been ripped away from me because I realized how badly it was contributing to my weight problem. I hope that someday I’ll have a lot more willpower and can bake again, but it just doesn’t feel like an option right now. And I really, really miss it.
Besides the Weight Watchers stuff, the last few weeks have just seemed especially hard. Caden and Shepard have just been sooo cranky. When Caden gets frustrated he gets naughty. These days that usually means attacking Shepard and completely ignoring every single thing I say to him. Shepard is a tantrum thrower. Which is actually kind of funny sometimes because Caden was never a throw himself on the ground kicking and screaming kind of kid. Watching Shepard do that just strikes me as funny. At least once a day. When he’s doing it a hundred times a day….it’s not so funny anymore. I’ve been pretty irritable with them lately and have really been struggling to have the tiniest amount of patience.
I’m assuming that starting school and working around a new schedule is the main reason for Caden’s crankiness. He’s never been able to handle different situations very well, even if they’re fun changes. He’s always at his worst on Mondays after a weekend filled with Daddy and extended family. So I assume I can blame school for his short temper. Though he seems to really be enjoying it after three days. I’m happy for him and hope that he’ll start adjusting. Especially since his schedule is going to be a lot more filled in the coming weeks. He’s going to start additional speech therapy again, he’ll be going to the occasional art class, and I plan on putting him in swimming lessons on the days he’s not in preschool. He’s going to be one busy boy!
Yesterday seemed like it was going to be one of the last nice days for awhile, so we went to our river spot to throw rocks after school. I’m not sure why throwing rocks in water is so much fun, but they definitely have a great time doing it!
So that’s been my week. I’m really excited that we’re going on a weekend getaway to Door County tomorrow. It’ll be good to get out of our house for a few days and just have some fun. I think we all need a few days’ break from routine and schedules and stress. Hopefully at my week four weigh-in I’ll have a lot happier news to report!
